The shirt says it all " That's What I am Talking About!"   This is only one of the many fish that I catch.  I don't eat fresh water fish, so no fish were harmed during the making of this blog!  If that had been a croaker or a spot, than I would have to cut the part when I through it back in the water....(HA!)

The weather is changing, I've planted my garden, my flowers and I've sprayed the weeds.  I went out a week ago and brought me a new "Ugly Stick" and an " Abu Garcia"  Reel as my present for surviving the long hard winter.  This is what I caught, along with a cold because it was actually too cold to have my legs out like that!  Actually, I had walking pneumonia!  But the fishing was great and it was a great way to start the Spring.

If you want a friend to eat for a day, give him a fish.  If you want that friend to live long and stay healthy...TEACH HIM TO FISH!





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The Passover "Keep doing this in remembrance of me"

One of my outside the classroom experiences included me attending the Memorial/and or the Passover as referred to by Jehovah's Witnesses. On Monday April 14, 2014 I attended this ceremony as I have many years before.  Though I am not a baptized Jehovah's Witness, I find myself really respecting and appreciating this particular observance on Nisan 14th.  Of all the faiths that I have had the pleasure of learning more about, this one is to me the closest in it's interpretation of the Bible,  and they don't pick and choose which Holiday to celebrate and which ones to choose as an ordinary day.    It is clear that the Bible quotes Jesus saying "keep doing this in remembrance of me" referring to acknowledging the reason for his life, which was his death."  Every year when I go to this festivity, I am humbled because I think that Jehovah God must  be an Awesome God that he loved us  so much that he gave his only begotten Perfect son to free us of the curse (sin and death) that Adam and Eve brought against all of their offspring because they believed that they didn't need Jehovah to rule them.  Adam and Eve believed that they were able to challenge Jehovah's sovereignty.  Some say that this is a parable, I say this is God's truth. 

"Keep doing this in remembrance of me. " There is no scripture that says "keep celebrating my birth in remembrance of me".  Yet Christmas has become the biggest commercialized Holiday to date. Some  private offices may close, but Federal Offices remain open for Easter.  Some jobs allow a person their personal birthday off, but WWJD? (What Would Jesus Do?)  I am sure you all remember the bracelet.  Would Jesus make it a point to celebrate his birthday/ his vanity?  I don't think so.   

Before Christ actually passed around the sacraments around which represented his blood (wine) and his body (bread), he made sure that anyone that did not have his best interest in mind (referring to Judas the traitor) left the building.  This is another part of the Memorial Service that  I truly appreciate because it shows that Jesus didn't tend for EVERYONE to partake of the bread and wine, but a select few who's loyalty to Jesus Christ was unquestionable.  The witnesses actually observe the Passover by passing the wine and the bread for observance only for the general population.  The Brother gives the talk than explain who is to participate in actually partaking of the sacraments.  He always takes you to the scripture in Revelations that specifically says 144,000 will be in Heaven with Christ.  Then he excitedly let everyone in attendance know that even if you are not of the 144,000, you have a hope to live on Earth forever.

As usual, I left there ceremony feeling renewed.  I will be completely honest, I haven't been Baptized under any faith as they all have their own interpretation of the Bible, and they all have flaws in my opinion on  how their organizations were founded.  With The Mormons, you have to believe Joseph Smith's message as a prophet.   With the Muslims, you have to believe that Muhammad was God's prophet.  With the Witnesses, you have to believe in Charles Russell. All of the above named religion was touched in some way by Calvinism and Lutheranism. I just try to believe in GOD, and live a good life, give more than I take, and love with all my heart.  When I mess up, I pray to GOD for forgiveness.

Spankings

I chose to give a speech on Spankings last Wednesday.  I chose this particular subject because it required me choose a position and support it.  It was very hard for me to prepare for this speech because I am "old school" and I was raised in a family that was accustomed to spankings, beatings, corporal punishment, butt whippings, or whatever title you choose to assign to this ancient "ART".  In my home, the hand, switch or belt were used.  For the longest time, when I looked back at this practice, I thought it to be acceptable as none of my sibblings were ever in trouble with the law, and we were raised to be respectable and to be of good character.

As I prepared for my speech, I found myself almost deciding to take a different position.  As I spanked the stuffing out of my teddy bear with the switch, and than with the belt, I imagined it to be me as a child.  I remember days that I would cry because my spirit had been broken, but I didn't realize that this was the issue at that time. I knew that I used to think " how can they say they love me but beat me this way". 

Instead in my speech I choose to acknowledge that the law in Virginia emphasizes that a parent is not supposed to spank you with unbridled passion to a point that it is considered abusive. I also talked about the fact that the law also scrutinizes cases more harshly, if the parent leaves the targeted area of the rear end.  The law also takes into consideration the amount of spankings, length of spankings and the "Weapon" of choice".

Parents should also consider spanking a child in a private area.  Spanking a child  in a public area, such as a Mall or School is very embarrassing and could be more harmful than helpful.  Also a parent shouldn't spank a child in front of their sibblings.   Discipline is a one on one affair, that should be handled with discretion and with LOVE. 

So, is it possible to Love your child and choose to use corporal punishment.  Yes.  As parents learn to stop using spankings as a way to relieve their pent up aggression after a long days work, and began to plan the discipline in a loving way to get a useful result, than discipline is issued with love. A parent should choose the amount of swattings, the length of the discipline and only use coporal punishment for really severe "maladies" which could have caused harm to the child's safety or health.    In other words, corporal punishment is the "Medicine" that is prescribed use for really egregious infractions.  The same way that a doctor use morphine for extreme pain, corporal punishment should be used for severe infractions.

That is my position for the time being.

Marriage is a compromise... But it is Worth It!

Here I am at the Library during Spring Break, trying to put the finishing touches on my 3 essays.  I want to stay at home, but my hubby is so considerate that he drives me crazy.  Every 20  minutes he sticks his head in the door to ask "Are you ok"?  "You need something to drink".  "You mind if I give you a hug?" " You mind if I give you a kiss?".  I prayed to God for a good man like my Hubby, and he gave him to me.  Now, I just don't know what to do with  him?  Sometimes I want to hit a button and put him on pause like I do the television!!  So when I stay at the Library until 10:00 pm, I feel guilty but accomplished because I get everything done for my classes.
When I get home, the guilt sets in.  I look at my hubby and think..."Wow,  he ate hot dogs again for dinner."  So on my days off and when I leave school early, I fix his favorite foods and put a lot of love of into it!  Sometime when we go fishing.... I let him catch more fish, so that I won't be tempted to add insult to injury by gloating in my usual fashion!
Marriage is about being able to compromise.  My hubby is worth that to me and I know that I am worth that to him!!!!!!
Marriage is a never ending friendship.   I am so blessed that my man is a good person or I don't know how in the world I will do this "Until death do us part!"

Facebook and Me!

Since I have started my journey on the "No Judgment Zone" experience, I realize that Facebook is the biggest Judgment Zone around.  Whenever I have friends that have to use "Unfriend" as a weapon because someone said one thing that they didn't like, I think "Wow, has it really come to this?"  When I post, I post  fearlessly.  I approved the 301 friends that I currently have because I have known them for quite some time, I went to school with them , they are family members, or I have worshipped with them before or present.  I don't approve people I do not know.  So when I post an achievement or a happy moment, I assume I am sharing my information with people that has my best interest at heart.    If you are one of those people that I call a LURKER (A PERSON WHO JUST LOOKS AT POST BUT DON'T EVER HIT LIKE, BUT TALK NEGATIVELY ABOUT WHAT EVERONE ELSE WROTE),  please do not "friend" me or "unfriend" yourself from my page.    Trust and Believe, when you post positive things or you just seem to need a hug, I will find the right words to UPLIFT and BUILD YOU UP!!!!!  Isn't that what life is about?   Isn't that what love is about?  Facebook or any Social Media Sites are what we make them.   So make it Positive... so I can Positively enjoy your friendship while we "Facebook" each other.    Facebook is a verb right?

The Hearth Defended: My opinion about this piece by Mary Eberstadt and Myrna Blythe

Mr. Sweeney had our class to read " The Hearth Defended:  A Review of Home Alone America:  The Hidden Toll of Day Care, Wonder Drugs, and other Parent Substitutes ("Marriage and Family in the New Millenium").  by Mary Eberstadt/Myrna Blythe


First, I am not ashamed to say that I often wonder if "Women's Lib" was more harmful than helpful, not only to our nation, but most importantly, to the children.  As a woman, I say this because I know that I was created very differently than a man when it comes to my nurturing spirit.  I have all these emotions and attachments to children that I think were intentionally given to me as a woman as I believe that I was created this way by a higher being.   Don't misunderstand what I am saying, because I do know some men that are very loving and more attached than the mothers, but it is much fewer in the bigger picture.
I think that raising a human being  is much more challenging than running a corporation.  The balance comes from "mothering",  that natural nurturing that oozes from our bodies whenever a child is nearby, whether it is our own or someone else.   Fathers are equally important by setting a strong example of what it means to be the "head of the household", by making sure that his family is well taken care of.   I have yet to meet a women who deep down inside, really didn't want to be loved and taken care of by a man and have the opportunity to raise a child in a way that he would be a productive member of society.  Raising a child means teaching them how to spend and save money, how to present themselves in public, making sure that they have an acceptable amount of education, teaching them how to react to emotions, making sure that hey have their spiritual needs met, etc.  How can you do this successfully when both parents are at work? 


Eberstadt describes a sick toddler, who should be home in bed, spending all day at a daycare center plaintively calling for his mommy.  She talks about parents who are unable or unwilling to miss a day at work would often dose their children with Tylenol to bring down their fevers before dropping them off at day care.  Babies need their mothers.  Look at Nature for what it is. For most breed of animals the old adage is true "Mommy's babies, Daddy's maybe's."  In other words, we usually see the female of most breads doing the nurturing until their offspring are able to sustain itself.  Why is it hard to accept that maybe we  as women were created to nurture these babies until they go out on their own.    Finding a man that is "Man enough" to allow you that precious time is a different subject for a different article.


Our collective need to drive the market for jobs also contributed to the NEED for two parents to work in order to pay the bills.  Our need to have the swankiest houses have contributed to the NEED for two parents to work to pay the bills.  " How much do we really love our children?", I ask myself sometime.  Do we love them enough to sacrifice our own personal desire to be some "big wig" in a company, whereas, when everyone goes home they don't give us a 2nd thought. Yet your babies think of you with great love and admiration AT ALL TIMES.


Just my opinion !  Later!

Marriage Still Matters

As usual, Professor Sweeney, assigned some very interesting reading which got my head spinning because I don't know where to go with my thoughts on some very controversial matters. For  this blog, I will deal with the following information submitted by Jeff Kemp and Harvey Drake, Jr that was in their piece entitled " Marriage Still Matters  to Washington's Children" inspired by the court rulings in King and Thurston counties which overturned Washington's Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA). :
       "We are linking arms as Allies for Marriage and Children to appeal to the vast numbers of Washingtonians troubled by the redefinition of Marriage, as well as the decades- long decay of marriage and absence of a common-sense voice defending it.  We will work with the state Legislature to find a constitutional solution to preserve marriage as the union of one man and one woman."


The very next sentence was cleverly written after that passage "Some would have you believe this effort is an attack on gays and lesbians. "


Personally, I feel that no matter how innocently we keep saying that this is not an attack on gays and lesbians, the reality is that it is an attack on them.  Once again, we are all the sum of our parts. What makes us who we are is in our genetics,  religion, culture, values, character, and experiences. My Christian values tell me that God created a man and woman to "become many and fill the earth."  I feel that as an irresponsible Christian, I will stop there and throw out all the other portions of the Bible where it says "Love thy neighbor as thyself" and "If anyone says I love God and hates his brother, he is a liar; for he who does not love his brother whom he has seen cannot love God whom he has not seen".. 
It certainly isn't love that denies two women or two men the right to co-parent and share all the joys that comes with being a parent.  Or is it?  In order for us to judge them, we must first think ourselves superior to them.  Why don't we scream as loud when a single mother chooses to procreate and raise  children without fathers?
Love is Love, and as long as you are loving up on that child and teaching them right from wrong based on the "sum of YOUR parts", and they grow into a healthy human being knowing the true meaning of love, piety, character, compassion, etc, than we should just "Let Go and Let God!"...be the judge. 
So where do I stand on this subject?   I still don't know.

Mind Blowing Experience for this NonTransitional Student!

I am considered a non-traditional student because I didn't attend college directly out of high school.  Heck, it has been 28 years....WOW!  What I have discovered as a non-traditional student is that I appreciate the learning process more, but, it is mind blowing in that I am learning things that forces me to re-evaluate my personal values and ideas which I have had 46 years to embrace and to make my own.  My learning experience is so much different than that of my classmates of 18 -25 years old who are still molding their character, values and ideas. 
 As a Postal Union official for the last 15 years, I was always very assured and confidant because my knowledge base was remarkable.  I was like a robot, someone file a grievance, I will investigate, process and mediate and send it up to the next step because managers usually do not negotiate at Step 1 or 2.   In order to be successful, I had to know my "opponents weaknesses."  I mean it was predictable that a grievance would be "procedurally defective", or the same supervisor who lied often will predictably lie again and I will corner them on paper.  However, now that I am back in school, I am being forced to look at my weaknesses in order to rebuild my brand. 
For example, sitting in my Sociology class, I get to squirming because sometime I feel like the professor is using his position to push his conservative views on others by providing more evidence that supports his views, when I am sure there is just as much evidence out there that supports a liberal point of view.  Than I have to wake myself up and say  "There you go again, personalizing a view in a way to win the argument!" That Union Steward, and Honor Graduate of the US Marine Corps spirit in me just won't die.   In other words... I am already the "sum of all my parts", while my classmates have an edge by being "new and fresh" and less opinionated.  So just like I did in bootcamp, I find myself tearing down and rebuilding a stronger, and wiser me that would be better equipped with the ability to respect and appreciate opposing views.  Most of all I hope to take my gift to compromise when necessary to the next level.    Stay tuned!  Work in Progress!

Between the Drafts

Recently, my professor Mr. Sweeney, had the class to read "Between the Drafts" by Nancy Sommers and I not only found it to be informative, but I found it to be enlightening.  Basically, what I got out of it was that the only way to create an original composition is to not be afraid to venture from the road that is most frequently traveled. 

It is important to learn the "Academics" of writing.  However, it is most important to stay true to yourself.  Our writings are a reflection of our experiences, our moods, our education, etc.   Thus, when we write a true original, it will reflect all of these elements which makes us who we are individually. For example, as I have been working on my Religion Essay, I chose a topic that is somewhat controversial, yet, it represented me and my background and it clearly shows that my Religious background teachings definitely guided my submissions on this subject.  Everyone from time to time, grapple with the "Evolution or Creation" issue.  I was 46 as of the 15th of this month and I still have to convince myself from time to time that creation is the only acceptable answer if you call yourself a Christian. Therefore, my thesis is basically stating that carbon dating is not a an exact science, and without that exact science, there is really no real standard to determine that the Bible is  not accurate in its depiction of how and when the heavens, earth and humans were created.

 Now that I am back in school and actually listening to  my teachers this time around, especially in my Western Civilization class, I find that my experiences, and education is affecting how I write and what I choose to write about.  Before I could finish my Religion Essay, I found myself almost trading sides of my own thesis.  All I know is that when I finish it, it will reflect my true self at that time. I will rely on the statistics and the hard evidence that supports either side, but in the end, I will chose the side that mostly reflect who I am as a person.

  I will end my Blog with a quote from Nancy Sommers Essay on " Between the Drafts:

"It is in the thrill of the pull between someone else authority and our own, between submission and independence that we must discover how to define ourselves.  In the uncertainty of that struggle, we have a chance of finding the voice of our own authority.  Finding it, we can speak convincingly... at long last."

Crime and Punishement Essay Assignment

I have finally narrowed my subject down for my crime and punishment assignment, but now I am having a hard time trying to find a Title that will really capture what I am saying.  If I put the Title that my argument is leaning towards, I will definitely look like a creep because I picked a side of the argument that would challenge me the most.  So I am leaning towards "Why we should do away with the Sexual Offender Registry".  There I said  it!  Don't Judge Me!  My research and my personal journey while writing this paper made me realize that it is the laws that we need to address on how to punish sexual predators.  For every crime, there is punishment and rehabilitation.  However, for sexual predators, another tier has been added which is "the public's right to know".  Why isn't there a Registry for thieves, or Murderers?  When we continue to force these people to join these registries, aren't we in a way creating a subset of human beings that have their own laws until the day they die, or until their crime is pardoned by that jurisdiction, which is nearly impossible.   Streaking is considered a sexual crime in some states, should they be required to join a sexual offender registry?  How about when an 18 year old and a 16 year old who had consensual sex and the parents of the 16 year old want to have the 18 year old arrested for statutory rape...  Should the 18 year old be bound by the sexual predator regulations? 

There are documented cases of sexual offenders being killed by neighbors after the community discovered from the sexual offender registry that it contained the name of the deceased.   What are we as a nation doing to these people psychologically, when we don't allow them to do their time and move on to become productive members of society?  There are documented cases of people being fired after their employer finds out that they are on the sexual offender registry.  Is this fair?

As for the victims of sexual crimes, they deserve to know that a person who is insensitive enough to put them through the turmoil of violating their body, children and adults, without their consent, will be punished appropriately for their crime.  Most sexual offenders serve an average of 3.5 years of an 8 year sentence.  Shouldn't we be looking at the laws more so than the Sexual Registry?  Is the Sexual Registry Ethical?

Disrobing My Self-Centered View of the World!

I am going through a transformation in my life, whereas, I would like to see people for who they are and not for what I want them to be.   In other words, I want to stop Judging people, even though I don't think that I was doing it in a harmful way.

"JUDGING REQUIRES THAT YOU THINK YOURSELF SUPERIOR OVER THE ONE YOU JUDGE!"

There are quite a few things that made me realize that I could make my burden much lighter if I addressed this immediately.  However, I am only going to tell you about three of the motivations for my desire to be "Judgement Free"

• The book called the "The Shack" by WM Paul Young, was thought provoking.  That is where I ripped off that Judging quote above.  When I unintentionally judged someone in the past, OK, maybe I did judge some people out of pure meanness, I must have thought that I was so high and righteous enough to do so.  Maybe I was just doing it to make myself feel better as I have accused others of doing.  I generally love people, and for a living I have dedicated myself to defending people's basic rights to the best of my ability even if means being retaliated against. Yet, when someone slighted me verbally, I would say things like "they were spawned by Satan, they are just Ghetto!, he/she is a racist, that's why they are suffering cause they are reaping their Karma!"  It really wasn't my place to say these things because they weren't necessarilty true, but for some cruel reason, it made me feel better to say those things at that time. 
• The 2nd reason is because I have a relative that I love with all my heart, just like a sister.  (I am the youngest of 5 and I am only the only girl).  She goes to Church every Sunday, but she uses  God and the Bible like a weapon.  I mean she rebuke everybody because she is a "Child of God".  Anybody who curse, drink, smoke, dance a little suggestive, or don't put money in the plate when it get passed around is going straight to "hell"!  Yet she will pick up a Lottery Ticket so fast it will make your head spin.  Despite that, I still think that she is a Child of God, just as I am with all my sins because I thought that was why God sent his son to redeem us all.  
• The third reason that I need to enter the "No Judgement Zone" is because everyone has a past.  Even murderers.  That is why we are required to forgive others of their trespassing.   When I see the man outside of the liquor store begging for change, now I ask myself "What happened to this person to bring him here?"  When I see a young lady who "sleeps around", I ask "I wonder if someone took advantage of her as a child, because studies shows that molested children often grows up to be promiscuous adults?"  When I see a young man who has very feminine qualities, I ask "Is he alone in this world dealing with what is a very scary and isolating issue? Did his family abandon him just because he  decided to stay true to his feelings and emotions?  

I could go on and on.  But I won't...............! I just want to say that if this blog made you feel a little uncomfortable, it is becuase you probably need to take the "No Judgement Journey" with me.  I could use a little company, cause I don't want to be alone when I strip myself bare and see all the things about myself that I didn't see because I was too busy Judging others. 

Complaining Ain't goin to change a Thang!

It's cold, but I don't want to complain about it because it won't change anything other than me contributing to the negative vibes out there in the atmosphere.  I will say this though, when you turn 45, it seems that is the time when your body reacts to extreme cold in a way that you wouldn't believe.  My finger that I slammed in a door when I was 6 years old, feels like someone climbed inside of it and is chiseling away at the tendons and flesh.  It's not until I get into the warmth for about 30 minutes before it began to subsides.  My knees, Whooooooaaaaaa!  They lock up and do what they want, when they want. Running would be a nice thing to do, if I could do it.

  However, in spite of it all, I am still happy about the opportunity to be back in school and learning all kinds of cool stuff that I didn't really care about when I was 18 years old. 

Now could I complain about how much homework that I get every week?  Of course I could, but I won't! What is the use of coming to school and not expecting to learn about the subjects that I CHOSE to take. I used to hate History classes.  Now I realize that I missed a lot in my partying years.  There should be a rule that if you are too busy partying, you shouldn't be able to go to college until you are done hitting the clubs.   I am actually reading a book about the Civil War.  It's talking about the types of people who fought in the war and their personal reasons for fighting in the war, whether it was on the Union or Confederate side. I will no longer complain about those people who choose to display the confederate flag on their boats, clothing, or cars.  I respect and understand their rights to feel strongly about their views.  

I will not complain about the social issues that is going on in the world, because Dr. Morgan is giving me a better understanding of how things work in my sociology class.  I understand that uneducated theories are contributing to the problems and the only way to contribute to the conversation is to make yourself knowledgeable about the facts first. 

I won't even complain that Mr. Sweeney, my English professor,  is making me blob once a week for a grade. The positive side of this is that I love to talk, and this gives my husband a break from all my ramblings! 

So until next week......Peace out!

Fish out of Water!

At 45 years old, I have decided to go for my degree that has alluded me my entire life.  I always wanted my degree, because I promised my dearly beloved Dad, that I would get it.  I just kept getting sidetrack.  I joined the Marines a week after graduating from High school.  I asked to be assigned on the West Coast after graduating because I wanted to get away from my parents while I partied Hard!  However, there were too many monkey wrenches thrown into my "party plans".

• First of all, my dad would come to California from Virginia, just like I lived across the street.  I could be out bowling with my mini, mini, mini skirt (don't judge me), and here he come, talking about he was just in the neighborhood and wanted to take me out for pie ala mode. 
• Then there was Mom, who somehow got a hold of  the Chaplains phone number on base and would call that man to humiliate me by pulling me out of class, just so that I would call her or write my Grandma a letter if I went a whole week without calling. 
• Then there were the curfews imposed on Marines going into Tijuana, Mexico (Party Central...should've been called Tequila, Mexico!).  I miss that place....Don't Judge Me!

I could go on and on about all of the obstacles I encountered while trying to get my party on, all you need to know is that I found a way to overcome them!

After the Marines, I worked at a Social Services in Virginia, and I realized that it comes naturally for me to help people and to stand up for the unethical treatment of people in the workplace.
I than worked for the Post Office for 19 years, of which, 18 years I was very heavily involved in the Union serving as a Steward, Vice-President, and then a President.

Point is, I never took the time to get my degree even though I yearned to get a Master's Degree in something that would allow me to help people on an astronomical scale.  As I see some of the young folk here throw such an opportunity away here at Richard Bland College, I wish I could just shake them and say "Wake Up!  You are a future leader of America. You are about to unfairly inherit a bunch of issues that society has created for you, and you better understand that you need to learn how to fix these problems FAST!"

I am grateful to my understanding and supportive husband who understands my desire to get my degree. So when you see me in the Library Monday-Thursday until 10:00pm, it is because I am on a mission!

I feel like a fish out of water walking around with all these young adults younger than my nieces and nephews. However, the plus about being older is that I am not preoccupied with what others think   I don't care about name brand clothing, I don't care about "Who is going with who".  I just want to show "My man" that his support and loyalty to me while I do this "college thing" is worth all the sacrifices that we both made to get me here!